Domestic Abuse Intervention Services of Dane County (DAIS) celebrated its 30th anniversary yesterday, with Gloria Steinem as its keynote speaker. I wrote about it (as I’ve told you a hundred times and will tell you a hundred more) for the October issue of Madison Magazine, and an article in today’s local paper gives a nice summary of what went down at the jam-packed luncheon. (Try not to read the community comments after the article, they were clearly written by people with whom I would never be friends. Unlike you, Dear Reader.)

Ms. Steinem actually said quite a few things that I had already quoted her as saying, but that took nothing away for me, because there was nothing like hearing her speak the words in person. Like I said yesterday, I’m having a hard time recalling exactly what she said, but I do remember this: She spoke with her hands, as many of us do, but when she did it, she uncurled one long, slender finger at a time, then curled each in turn back into her palm, and the fluidity of the movement precisely matched the cadence of her words. And she wore a silver ring. That’s pretty much what I remember. For what it’s worth.

Additional thoughts on the event itself:

1.) There must’ve been a thousand people there, no kidding.

2.) My name was in the program (wha?? Can you say SCRAPBOOK???)

3.) The seats directly surrounding Gloria (including mine) probably could have held worthier butts. It’s kind of a shame that big donors and starstruck reporters got that once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, rather than the countless DAIS volunteers, battered women, and remarkable young men of the DELTA Project who were sitting about a hundred yards away from Herself. Just sayin’.

4.) Each seat had a copy of the Madison Magazine issue that held my Gloria article. This issue also held a feature on UW Football coach Bret Bielema by my buddy Frank Bures. During dinner, when Sheriff Mahoney found out which article I’d written, he asked, eyes twinkling, if I was disappointed that I didn’t get the Bret interview (*snort*). This was another reason I took to him instantly. As I’ve told many of you many a times, Funny before Form, people! Funny before Form. (I also asked him, while trying to get up the nerve to go up to Glo and take a picture, if I had his department’s backing – he said absolutely. So there.)

5.) There’s something else I should’ve mentioned yesterday, a key component of the gala: the DELTA project. I swear to God, all over Dane County, local high school boys are getting together and talking about their feelings. They call it “man’s group” amongst themselves. Can you believe this? We watched video of these kids speaking to the camera about what it is, what it means to them, and what it means to the world. I am here to tell you, if this program was embraced in every American middle and high school, not only would there be no more domestic violence, there would be no more war. I honestly believe this. Of course, federal funding for the project runs out in 2008.Whuddya know.

OKAY.

I think I’m finally done talking about this. Moving on. No more blog posts this long. You’re welcome. No wait – Thank you.